skip to Main Content

Orange is the new red, white and blue: Yeti for President 2016

Posted on 04.13.16 by Spyglass


He’s a true patriot. And don’t ask to see his birth certificate. He was born in Bedlam, Minnesota to working class parents. His father was an artist/writer and his mother was a piano teacher, but due to the enormity of his hands, he had a difficult time mastering Chopin. As his overarching political platform and agenda continue to take shape, there are a few things he’s adamant about. Though he is loosely affiliated with the Surprise Party, he also stands for some simple things we can all believe in:

  1. No Nude Taxes
  2. Two-For-One Tuesdays
  3. Three-Day Weekends
  4. Four-Pack Abs
  5. 5x the Fun
  6. Free Coffee Fridays
  7. Bolder Brand Strategies
  8. Better Creative for All


Big Orange Yeti has a platform, but what he really needs now is a campaign slogan. Please submit your suggestions in six words or less to the Spyglass Facebook page or email [email protected]. Big Orange Yeti and our nation thank you.